The Internet's 9 Biggest Crimes Against Food
They'll make you say, “I’m calling the police.”
This article was contributed by Leah Scalzadonna, an editor for Food Network.
However, there are some foodie phenomena so preposterous that they can only be considered crimes. Though candy-topped pizza, jellied spaghetti, and other bizarre creations can’t technically be considered illegal, these food crimes certainly served their time in the social-media spotlight.
To pea or not to pea — that is the question the New York Times asked with their ultra-viral guacamole recipe, which calls for the inclusion of English peas.
Originally published in 2013, the recipe was the subject of a Twitter storm after the publication tweeted the link in 2015, along with the caption, “Add green peas to your guacamole. Trust us.”
The spectacle surrounding pea-gate grew so large that even Barack Obama weighed in. He tweeted, “respect the nyt, but not buying peas in guac. onions, garlic, hot peppers. classic.”
While we’re not opposed to experimentation, we’ll never say no to the classic guac, either!
2. Brussels Sprouts Sliders
Don’t wipe your screen; you read that correctly. After the controversy of pea-gate died down, the New York Times kicked it right back up with its 2017 recipe for Brussels sprouts sliders.
Made of crunchy Brussels sprouts “buns” and a filling of caramelized onions and tempeh, the publication referred to the recipe as your “new favorite” holiday appetizer.
Twitter was remarkably incensed, with one user responding that he’d rather resort to cannibalism. But, hey — at least there weren’t peas in it.
3. Chicken Fingers in Soda
There’s plenty to say about the 2018 U.S. Open. After all, it is one of the foremost tennis tournaments in the world. However, all eyes at the tournament were on one hungry fan whose unconventional eating method basically broke the Internet.
The fan in question, who was caught on camera by ESPN, can be seen using an ice-cold soda (which appears to be cola, for what it’s worth) as a sauce for her chicken strips.
Though Twitter was obsessed with this unconventional method, we have to ask — is dipping your chicken fingers in soda that different from eating cola barbecue ribs? We’ll let you be the judge.
4. The Peepza
There’s a lot one can do with pizza — and we’re not talking about pineapple (though that’s certainly up for debate).
Back in 2010, the now-defunct Slice NYC blog launched the original Peepza, a cheese pizza served with melted Peeps on top. In the following years, the Peepza has continued to pop up across the internet, with one user bringing it back in September 2018.
Though we’re not opposed to a sweet-and-savory mix, we prefer our candy as, well, candy. But if you really want to cook with Peeps, these chick and egg cupcakes should do the trick.
5. Apple’s Bagel Emoji (Without Cream Cheese)
In the not-so-distant past, bagel enthusiasts were utterly disappointed with the lack of bagels in the emoji lexicon. However, once Apple unveiled the long-awaited emoji, the outrage only grew stronger.
Many people (particularly those on the East Coast) didn’t care for the tiny icon, which flattened the texture and skipped the cream cheese. In fact, Philadelphia (the cream cheese company), even set up an online petition entitled “Get cream cheese added to the bagel emoji.” The petition worked, and Apple soon updated its bagel emoji to include cream cheese and a fluffier texture. Our Insta-brunch captions have never been the same.
6. This Unbroken Kit Kat
When it comes down to it, food is ultimately subjective. Preferences vary from person to person, and that’s OK. But when the instructions to eat a candy are literally written into its jingle, it’s pretty shocking to see someone eat said candy with reckless abandon.
So, after a Twitter user revealed that her boyfriend took a giant chomp out of a Kit Kat (without breaking off a piece first), the internet quickly took notice. Some replies advised her to dump him, while others said the photo was “painful.”
However, he’s not the only one with an unconventional method for eating Kit Kats — perhaps Kourtney Kardashian could give him some advice?
7. The Retro Spaghetti-O Jello Mold
We’re time-traveling back to Grandma’s house for this one. Well, kind of.
Shared Food blew up the internet when they posted a video for a retro Spaghetti-O Jello in 2017. After the Spaghetti-O-gelatin mixture is chilled, the recipe suggests placing sliced Vienna sausages in the middle.
8. Bread-Sliced Bagels
Bagels may seem innocuous, but don’t be fooled — they’re one of the most controversial foods around.
Well, the secret’s out now, and it didn’t go over well. Though some were in support of the thin, vertically cut bagels, the majority were furious. Any way you slice it, it’s clear that bagels are not to be messed with.
9. Fruit Punch in Tuna Salad
In February 2019, Adrienne Bailon shocked her fans when she revealed that she puts fruit punch in her tuna salad. And that’s not all. After making a tuna fish sandwich, she dips the sandwich directly into a glass of the sweet stuff.
In her YouTube video, Bailon promised that her tuna sandwich is “bomb.” Her fans, on the other hand, were not so convinced. “My whole body flinched when she dipped the sandwich in the punch,” one commenter wrote. Based on the others, she’s definitely not alone.